Missmarie

All the president's men From MarkJT in In Vino Veritas (3 days old)

It’s possible that H, R and P see me in a different light these days. I see them regularly, of course, and try to ensure that I’m involved in the things they do. But, inevitably, I have more time t… more

Love pease but no understanding From MarkJT in In Vino Veritas (38 days old)

Security staff at airports weald enormous power. It’s no use trying to outfox them. Just comply. I’m becoming a regular user of one particular airport and over the past few months have had a few th… more

Totally Weird From MarkJT in In Vino Veritas (60 days old)

Colin at work loves The Wire. He’s the only one who watches it but we all have the feeling that we’ve watched it too. Several times. Apparently it was the 58th consecutive episode last night. Or somet… more

Rise and shine From MarkJT in In Vino Veritas (66 days old)

The Chief Psychiatrist loves his garden. And, I must admit, so do I. It has taken a lot of loving care and attention but it’s worth it - especially at this time of year when it is full of colour. … more

Sprightly Betty From MarkJT in In Vino Veritas (79 days old)

Betty lives two doors down and for an 80 something is more energetic than most. I found myself accompanying her down town today. We took the shortcut down a country lane then across a field. In … more

Bank to print extra 50 billion pounds From MarkJT in NewsHound (178 days old)

No wonder the government had to borrow so much money; the MP's have spent it all! Fear not though! The 'apology cheques' currently being written out will no doubt lead to some green shoots of recover… more

Goodwin title strip 'considered' From MarkJT in NewsHound (185 days old)

News just in. Although the current Sir Fred has stated that he was only claiming what he was entitled to, this defence is only open to those who made the rules and no-one else. The Forfeiture Committe… more

Lodgers and dodgers From MarkJT in In Vino Veritas (193 days old)

I look forward to my weekly trips to The Menagerie. Well, it’s not actually the menagerie I look forward to – it’s seeing H, R and P. They’ve always got so much to tell me and inevitably they all try … more

Obesity 'produces greenhouse gases' From MarkJT in NewsHound (202 days old)

Budget Update : Alistair Darling will be introducing a new Wind Fart tax. Extra! Extra! Read All About It!… more

Health & safety clowns still at it From MarkJT in NewsHound (202 days old)

A spokesman said, 'He's going to be wearing his sad face for some time' Extra! Extra! Read All About It!… more

BATTERED NICOLA: I WANT AN APOLOGY From MarkJT in NewsHound (206 days old)

'........but not before I've deposited my £50000 into a bank account. It's not the principle anymore'. Extra! Extra! Read All About It!… more

Home Office launches probe into Green leaks affair From MarkJT in NewsHound (208 days old)

A spokesman said, 'Ok, ok. We should have done this in the first place. It's just that we had loads of taxpayers' money to spend so we thought we'd involve the police'. Extra! Extra! Read All About … more

Arrest over court 'garlic alert' From MarkJT in NewsHound (208 days old)

A spokesman said, 'He's being held at arm's length at the moment and has been given some parsley to chew in an effort to neutralise the niff'. Extra! Extra! Read All About It!… more

Police delete London tourists' photos 'to prevent terrorism' From MarkJT in NewsHound (208 days old)

A spokesman said, 'They looked like terrorists so we had no option but to arrest them' Extra! Extra! Read All About It! … more

Plonkers From MarkJT in In Vino Veritas (219 days old)

At The Priory, Friday and Saturday nights invariably involve wine tasting sessions. What started as a ruse to squeeze a glass of wine or two out of the Chief Psychiatrist has now become a weekly ritua… more

What's cooking? From MarkJT in In Vino Veritas (235 days old)

Even though I’m living at The Priory I am still fairly self sufficient. I cook for myself most nights (although I allow Chief Nurse to do the Sunday Roast, of course). It’s a habit I can’t get out of … more

Tune in, turn off From MarkJT in In Vino Veritas (247 days old)

During our journeys to the train station the Chief Psychiatrist and I listen to local radio. It beats listening to the doom and gloom on Radio 4 at the moment (besides the presenters never seem to ask… more

Flip! Nearly missed it! From MarkJT in In Vino Veritas (257 days old)

I returned to The Menagerie for a couple of days this week. As I made my way there on Tuesday (Shrove Tuesday!) I suddenly realised it was Pancake Day as well. I just had to remember to get some in… more

The joy of text From MarkJT in In Vino Veritas (264 days old)

I’m in a routine now. Every week day, I get up at the same time, I get to work at the same time, I leave work at the same time, get picked up at the same time and arrive at The Priory at the same t… more

Where there's wine there's a way From MarkJT in In Vino Veritas (282 days old)

I’ve been gradually moving my stuff from The Menagerie to The Priory over the last few weeks. When H, R and P are in bed, I pack another box of stuff. Oddly, it’s quite a cathartic experience – I’ve c… more

Surely thumb mistake From MarkJT in What Would You Do? (285 days old)

You arrive early at work. Your 'phone bleeps receiving a text. It says, 'Mark. Save me a desk. There's trouble on the line ;) Carol' You don't know anyone called Carol. What would you do… more

Milk. Two sugars. From MarkJT in In Vino Veritas (289 days old)

I ended up going to the party. As I’ve mentioned, it was a James Bond theme. I didn’t have time to organise and outfit so I went as myself. ‘It’s Oddjob!’ chorused the assembled guests as I walke… more

Pick Me Up From MarkJT in In Vino Veritas (295 days old)

Being at The Priory means I have less opportunity to socialise (not that I did much before) because I have to rely on the Chief Psychiatrist for a lift home. It’s only fair that I keep him inform… more

Mii, myself and I From MarkJT in In Vino Veritas (299 days old)

I went to The Menagerie this week and saw H, R and P for the first time in a few days. Silly, I know, but I was excited! I was expecting a rapturous welcome and but came across indifference inste… more

Theory of relativity From MarkJT in In Vino Veritas (303 days old)

I always knew that the theory of relativity had something to do with distance and time. I think I've got it now. It goes something like this; the further you are away from someone the quicker tim… more

Fathers. Who'd have them? From MarkJT in In Vino Veritas (305 days old)

I think it must be in my genes. I love playing silly games with H, R and P whenever I get the chance. Even when I call them at The Menagerie I can’t resist the temptation. ‘Hello Dad,’ said P w… more

Tight fit From MarkJT in What Would You Do? (306 days old)

You're on your way home and just manage to squeeze onto the Tube. Your coat gets caught in the door and the train moves off. You want to get off at the next stop. It's then you realise that t… more

Great! Escape! From MarkJT in In Vino Veritas (307 days old)

‘Fancy a few beers, Bruv?’ ‘Have you got an Escape Plan?’ I replied. ‘What do you mean?’ ‘Well, the Chief Psychiatrist will want to know where we’re going,’ I said. ‘Don’t be silly. Come o… more

The Priory From MarkJT in In Vino Veritas (308 days old)

There are obvious advantages to living back at ‘home’ with your parents. Shirts magically iron themselves and you get cups of tea as you’ve always liked them. And there’s a constant supply of Hobnobs.… more

Could be worse From MarkJT in In Vino Veritas (309 days old)

It was the first day back at work and the first opportunity I had to wish my work colleagues a Happy New Year. ‘Have a good one Colin?’ ‘Not really. My mum nearly died on Christmas Day.’ Natu… more